Pretty Young Thing

To my beloved MJ,
Growing up in Indianapolis, Indiana during my formative years (yes, we were Hoosiers together, Mike!), I spent my ’90s childhood reveling in your genius. My older brother (and your #1 fan) Jolly was obsessed with mimicking your moves and your voice (when he wasn’t devoting himself to 2Pac, naturally), and when he [...]

Attention J.T., Rihanna, Kanye, Brit, Jay, Beyonce, Weezy, Gaga, Taylor Swift, Jonas Brothers, et al.:
Two things happened in 1982: 1) I was born AND 2) Michael Jackson released Thriller. The former is kind of like a big deal; whereas, the latter is a HUGE deal. The sales of every album in each of your individual [...]

Dearest Carine,
For years you’ve dazzled the fashion industry with your easily-identifiable brand of sexy rock ‘n’ roll cool and that Parisian je ne sais quoi that sparks carnal lust in men and greedy desire in card-wielding females. You’ve managed to out-shock the competition with your devilish “sex sells” mantra and Margiela-swathed strut, frolicking in the [...]

Hi Mr. Jay-Z,
Some people think Lil Wayne is the best rapper alive. Some people say DJ Khaled. Additionally, others be fronting like Q-Tip holds that title. No disrespect to those other heavyweights, but you’re soooooo good at rapping - you’re the best. Perhaps, detractors don’t like the pop songs you’ve been making since In My [...]